Victory Road was a piece of cake and so was the Elite Four. Steven's Mega Metagross was no match for Elliot the Mega Swampert. It surprisingly endured his first Earthquake, but apparently it didn't know any good moves against Water/Ground-types, since all it did was use Bullet Punch. Steven, you disappointed me.
Anyway, enough of that shit. I want to talk about something far more interesting that is the Delta Episode.
WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD IF YOU HAVEN'T PLAYED THROUGH THE DELTA EPISODE YET OR READ ABOUT IT ONLINE! I DON'T FEEL LIKE USING SPOILER TAGS, HOWEVER, SO KNOW THAT YOU MUST STOP READING NOW IF YOU DON'T WISH TO BE SPOILED.Oh, man. It was awesome. It was even better than the Looker story in XY for several reasons. First, it happened all over Hoenn instead of just one city. Second, it had Team Magma in it even though I'd already beaten and apparently reformed them. I love beating up those Grunts, they're so weak. I got to level up my Prize Money O-Power big time. Third, all the cutscenes were interesting and revealed a ton of cool stuff despite pissing all over everything we learned about Mega Evolution's origins in XY. Either Game Freak or Sycamore is a lying hack, take your pick. Anyway, fourth, Zinnia. She was such an awesome character, talking to rocket scientists and Steven the former Champion like they were a bunch of ignorant fools. She also kicked Team Magma's asses like it was nobody's business and straight up stole things from other people in front of everybody and even destroyed their stuff. Man, that chick was a
badass. Fifth, and this is my favorite part, I got a ton of cool stuff during the Delta Episode, including TMs, Maxie's Cameruptite and, oh yeah,
fucking Mega Rayquaza and a goddamn level 80 Deoxys.I'll go into details now as best as I can. I only played through the whole thing a few hours ago, but it had a LOT of stuff in it.
So, the first thing that happens after the credits and beating up Brendan (in a battle that gave me no Exp. Points, boo!) is a cute cutscene where my parents talk on the phone about an upcoming star show in Mossdeep City, you know, the one that's been foreshadowed a few times on the BuzzNav during the main game. Norman decides to be a no-show, saying that he has to work at the Gym that day. How could he possibly know that in advance, I can't guess. What do Gym Leaders even do on the days when Trainers don't show up to challenge them? So then my mom asks him about the tickets they've already paid for and they decide that the best thing to do with them is use them to set up their ten-year-old daughter with the neighbour's kid on a romantic date. Just like that, suddenly I have to go invite Brendan to see a star show with me. It's not like I have any say in the matter. Thanks a lot, guys.
Something far more interesting happens after that, though. A scientist in Mossdeep City notices that a meteoroid in space has changed its course for some reason and is now on collision course with the planet. OH SNAP. Professor Cozmo, who apparently works there despite living in Fallarbor Town, says something I can't quite recall, but I'm sure it was important.
Next, I see a female Magma Grunt on top of a high tower with a Whismur. She says that she won't be needing her uniform anymore and takes it off. Sadly, she seems to be wearing other clothes underneath, a pretty cool outfit and a cape. She and the Whismur talk something about the past and what's about to come, look up at the sky and say that they've only got days.
Back in Littleroot Town, I go down the stairs and Norman is there for once. He gives me the tickets to the show he decided to miss and tells me to go ask Brendan out. I guess I have no choice, but luckily something happens right after I step out of the house. There's that mysterious woman and her Whismur outside the house. She introduces herself as Zinnia and the Whismur as Aster and then tells me she already knows all about me, which is kinda creepy, but hey, I am Hoenn's new Champion and well-known hero after all. I can't remember everything she said, but she leaves quite soon, saying that we'll meet again. So then I go to Brendan's house, resigned to my fate, but guess what? Apparently someone's broken into their house and stolen Brendan's Key Stone. Brendan moans a little but tries to act tough in front of me and his mom, even though he basically admits that the thief kicked his ass when he tried to fight back. Then he warns me that the thief said she was heading to Petalburg next. It seems highly unlikely that the thief would have told him that, but I suppose in a Pokémon world, anything's possible.
So then I go to Petalburg, and what do I discover? Wally being harassed by everyone's favorite Magma Admin Cyberman, Courtney. She tells Wally to give her his Key Stone, but lo and behold, Wally says he doesn't have it any more because
it's already been stolen. Wooow. Looks like someone really has a thing for those Key Stones. Anyway, Courtney doesn't like that one bit and tries to take it out on me. Unfortunately the first Pokémon in my party at the moment is Sarah the Dustox, my weakest team member. Courtney's Camerupt makes short work of her, but my Pelipper Nanase quickly avenges her fallen comrade. After that, Courtney rants something about Maxie and leaves. I suddenly get a phone call from Steven, who tells me to come to Rustboro at once. (Apparently he can call me, but I can't call anyone. What.)
In Rustboro, Steven and his father Joseph (thanks, BuzzNav!) tell me about the Devon Corporation's history and the disaster that's about to destroy the world. You know, small talk. Fortunately Mr. Joseph has a plan to save the planet, because his company has developed a thing called Infinity Energy that comes from the power that happens when a Pokémon Mega Evolves and they intend to use it to warp the Meteoroid to a completely different spot in space and holy hell are you sure you're not a supervillain, Joe?
There's just one small problem. In order to make their gadget work, they need meteor shards for whatever reason. Well, I tell Joey that he has a shitload of people working for him, surely some of them could go to Granite Cave to collect some for him. Mr. J slaps his forehead, says "why didn't I think of that?", thanks me and apologizes for the trouble and I go home, wait until the world is saved by adult professionals, go on a date with Brendan and live the rest of my life with him just like my parents always wanted.
Yeah, right. The next thing I know, I've been sent to Granite Cave to find a piece of space rock for a billionaire who seemingly prefers to use child labor to help save the world rather than send his grown-up son to do this small thing for him even though he surely would have agreed. Anyway, there's Zinnia again, admiring the mural of Primal Groudon and going on about the ancient past once again. She guesses that I'm there to find a meteor shard (HOW?!) and wants to battle me. She's nice enough to wait until I'm ready, so I turn on the Prize Money O-Power and beat her in a battle. She manages to take out two of my Pokémon, so I have a feeling that next time she'll be even tougher unless I happen to be in control of a legendary sky dragon god or something. Nah, what are the odds?
After that, I get a call from Steven again and he tells to come back to Rustboro. I think. A lot of things happened, I'm not entirely sure that's what happened then. Anyway, I do as I'm told because I'm a good girl and when I arrive at Devon Co., that lame scientist dude whose ass I'm always saving runs out of the building and asks me to help him. Three Magma Grunts run out after him and I battle them all in a row. They're weak as fuck, but I regret not turning on the Prize Money O-Power before I battled them. I didn't save the game before that scientist wimp bumped into me, so I didn't get a chance to do it. Oh well, they were only Grunts. Admins and Bosses are the ones who have all the dough. So, after the Magmas are gone, that pussy sciency loser thanks me and almost gives me another Great Ball BEFORE he realizes that there's no time for that shit. Team Magma's stolen that important world-saving gadget whose name I've forgotten and now I have to go get it back because the police don't exist, fuck you very much. What's more, Steven has already left for Mossdeep, so I have little choice but to follow him even though he told me to meet him in Rustboro, the jerk.
Then I'm in Mossdeep. This time I remember to turn on the O-Power before I battle five Magma Grunts at the same time. However, even though all their Mightyena are only at level 25, five Intimidates isn't a laughing matter. My Girafarig Justin soon falls before the pack of wolves and I send out Susan the Walrein to finish the job with Surf. (Yeah, I have a physically offensive Girafarig. Deal with it.) After I've beaten the quintuplets, I decide to chat with them before I deal with their boss. I learn that Courtney's gone rogue and is currently working on her own against Maxie's orders. Why would anyone follow her, I haven't the slightest idea. Oh wait, that's right, she's hot and Maxie's not. That explains it.
Upstairs, Courtney and a random Grunt (male, of course) are threatening Cozmo and Steven. Courtney says that Leader Maxie is "broken" and that she must now "fix" Project AZOTH. She intends to destroy the spacey-wacey gadget she stole from Rustboro and let the Meteoroid crash into the planet to somehow "make a new beginning for humanity's sake", just like Maxie wanted to do. Yeah, lady, killing everyone is really going to progress humanity. Steven asks me for help, because surely the former Champion has no chance against a crazy bitch with only one Pokémon and her man-toy. Well, it turns out that Courtney is tougher than last time, because she can now Mega Evolve her Camerupt. Steven's Skarmory is dead meat and so is Justin the Girafarig after Courtney's manwhore's Mightyena is done with him. Once again the day is saved thanks to the
PowerpuffMega Swampert Elliot (and Steven's Armaldo, I guess). Courtney has an angry breakdown and things are said, I can't remember.
Who should show up at that point? Why, Zinnia and Aster, of course! She strolls in like a boss and quiets the arguments of the guard lady and Cozmo with astonishing audacity. Then she checks out the room and sees what these people are trying to do to save the planet and... laughs in their faces. She has her Whismur snatch the sciency-wiency thingamagig from Courtney and
breaks it in her hand. Damn. Everybody yells at her, but she just taunts them and says that they were about to repeat the mistakes of the past and add another whole bunch of mistakes on top. She spouts some nonsense about the Meteoroid destroying another Hoenn in another dimension if it had been warped there because she's apparently a Time Lady or something and nobody believes her. She doesn't care, though, she claims she knows what she must do and leaves just like that to wreck up Team Magma's hideout in Lilycove. Steven tells me to follow her and even Courtney seems concerned. Whatever. More money for me, so why not?
The first thing I notice at the Magma Headquarters are three Grunts who've been beaten up by Zinnia. They all say that I should be careful and wonder if even Leader Maxie will be able to stop her. My guess - no, he won't. What happens next is quite hilarious. As I go through the Headquarters, every Grunt who wants to battle are only doing so because they think I'm working with Zinnia and after I've defeated them and taken their money,
they apologize for their mistake. Ahahahahaha. It seems they're no longer afraid of me because now they have a new archenemy. I don't know if I should feel flattered or insulted.
When I reach Maxie's office, I see Tabitha and Maxie backing off from Zinnia, who has clearly just utterly destroyed them. Maxie can't believe he lost to a woman (hey!) and then sees me and calls me "child" again (HEY!) and Zinnia fucking loves it that I'm there, she knows that I've come to stop her and be a hero. Well, apparently I can't do shit right then because Zinnia just steals Maxie's Key Stone, laughs at me and says that she's going to the Sky Pillar and dares me to come after her. That's fine, but how the hell am I supposed to get in there? The last time I went there, I wasn't allowed in because I wasn't "worthy". So, Maxie and Tabitha have a little chat and they decide to give me Maxie's Cameruptite because he doesn't need it without his Key Stone. Thanks, but don't expect me to give it back after I've saved your Key Stone. Schmuck.
Then I'm summoned to the Meteor Falls to meet Steven and some old lady who's a member of an ancient people called "Draconids" who have lived in Hoenn since the beginning of time or something. She finally tells us who Zinnia is and what she intends to do. Zinnia is the Lorekeeper, whose job is to protect and preserve the tales of the Draconids and serve Lord Rayquaza, the protector of Hoenn. She tells us a story about the world's first Mega Evolution that happened in Hoenn thousands of years ago. In other words, fuck you, Sycamore and Gurkinn's ancestor. When she's finished, Steven heads back to Rustboro and I guess I have to follow him or something, I don't quite remember, it's late, shut up.
Shit happens, and the next thing I remember doing is flying to Sootopolis to meet Wallace, who coincidentally happens to be also a descendant of the Draconid People and has the right to enter the Sky Pillar. Whew, what a lucky break. So I follow him to the Sky Pillar, he opens the seal and... challenges me to a battle. It's his duty as a Draconid to test me, to see if I'm worthy of entering their holy place, because apparently my earlier triumph over him isn't good enough to tell him that. Well, sure, why not. I never turn down a challenge and that sweet, sweet prize money. Wallace uses the same team he has as a Champion in Emerald, which takes me by surprise, but it doesn't save him from defeat. Then I finally get to enter the Sky Pillar, which looks very different from the one in RSE. I'm glad those fucking pitfalls are gone and all I have to do is climb a few ladders. Zinnia is there waiting for me, and every time I approach her, she tells me a part of the story that took place thousands of years ago. Apparently there already has been two big Meteoroids strike Hoenn in the past. The first one created the Meteor Falls and the second one crashed into the mountain that eventually became Sootopolis City. This third one is much bigger than the previous two, however, so it must be stopped. So what is Zinnia's solution? Instead of relying on modern technology, she chooses to put her faith in a god. She knows all about Rayquaza and knows that it will always come to help when Hoenn is in danger. Sweet, I can see where this is going.
Apparently Zinnia and I spend the night together (!!!) on top of the Sky Pillar and when I wake up, she smiles and says I look adorable sleeping (!!!!!!!). And then she apologizes for knocking me out. Ouch. That's mean. Anyway, it's morning even though I'm playing the game in the evening and Zinnia decides that now is as good a time as any to summon Rayquaza. She prays to the heavens and stuff, and what do you know? Rayquaza does appear. The problem is, it seems that it can't Mega Evolve. Zinnia is shocked, how can this be? She realizes that the problem is not with her Key Stone, but with Rayquaza itself. (Actually, Rayquaza tells her that. Somehow.) So, what now? All is lost, the Meteoroid will destroy the planet and everyone will die. But wait! The Meteorite in my Bag starts to glow. About time too that thing did something, it's been foreshadowed to be important for quite some time. So Rayquaza... eats the Meteorite to gain its power, sure, why not. It still can't Mega Evolve, though, because it needs a little push and it seems that a battle is just the thing. Zinnia says that it's up to me now (what else is new) and that I must master Rayquaza. So I save the game, turn on Capture O-Power and... my Swampert KO's Rayquaza with a critical hit. I try again, throw a Quick Ball, it shakes three times and... Rayquaza breaks out. I battle it a bit, throw a Dusk Ball and IT GETS CAUGHT. JUST LIKE THAT. WHAT. Well, I'm not complaining. So then Zinnia congratulates me, teaches Rayquaza Dragon Ascent... somehow, and I'm off to save the world... But she wants to battle me first. Ugh, what is wrong with you Pokémon world people?! Anyway, I send Justin to the PC because Rayquaza KO'd him and then sweep Zinnia's entire team with Mega Rayquaza because I'm a jerk. After that's done, Zinnia names me Successor of the Draconid Lorekeepers and then I'm finally off to save the world
IN STYLE! I put on the Magma Suit I was allowed to keep and luckily it seems to work as a spacesuit too. Awesome music plays, I ride on Mega Rayquaza's back into space to FUCKING CRASH THROUGH THE GIANT METEOROID.
DAMN. Do NOT fuck with Rayquaza's planet, space junk!
But wait, what's this? One shard of the shattered Meteoroid is apparently sentient, because it moves around and...
sprouts tentacles?! Now would be a really good time for an underage Japanese girl like me to get the hell out of there, but it seems I can't, because a goddamn Deoxys breaks out of the rock and I have to battle it. Fun fact - I have never owned a Deoxys in any of my games before, so I am very excited. I send out Mega Rayquaza against Deoxys (well, like I have a choice, it's automatically the first Pokémon in my party) and then I see that Deoxys is ten levels higher than it. I'm so fucking pumped for an epic showdown between two legendaries and so I use Dragon Pulse... and
OHKO Deoxys. Fffffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
After that disastrous screw-up, I have little choice but to turn off the game and try again. Sigh. Here we go, Rayquaza wants to battle. I am prepared for a much longer and annoying battle this time, so I throw a Quick Ball mostly to fuck with myself...
AND IT CATCHES RAYQUAZA. I don't lose any Pokémon at all and the battle takes less than a minute. It finally dawns on me that Rayquaza's catch rate must have been lowered significantly in ORAS because it's so important to the plot. I wonder why Primal Groudon was such a bitch to catch then, but then I decide fuck it. Zinnia wants to battle, I sweep her entire team with Mega Rayquaza again because I'm still a jerk and then I destroy the Meteoroid again, which is just as awesome-looking the second time. Then Deoxys appears and now that I know that Mega Rayquaza is too strong for it, I decide to save myself a lot of time and pain and just throw my Master Ball. It's been years since I've used a Master Ball in any of my Pokémon games, I usually like to keep them. Not this time, though. I've never owned a Deoxys before.
So, then I see lots of dust and pretty sparkles in the sky from Zinnia's POV. The Meteoroid's been destroyed, and all the important characters all over Hoenn are seen to be relieved and happy. (Too bad all the regular NPCs didn't notice a thing. Nobody probably even told them that the planet was about to get blown up.) Cozmo is so happy he wants to make out with his male employee. Maxie and Courtney reconcile with a little help from an impatient Tabitha. Steven and Wallace have a long talk about how awesome I am. Steven seems to be ready to leave Hoenn soon and leave Wallace in charge of the Pokémon League as the new Champion (Ahem?! What about me? I beat you both and I am the current Champion!), but not quite yet. Wallace seems to be amused by the fact that Steven just assumes that he would be willing to be his successor without even asking him first. They share a laugh and head out somewhere to do who knows what.
Wally is seen at his home, I've gotten his Key Stone back and he's heading off to the Battle Resort. His parents are proud of him, he's gotten so well, maybe even TOO well. You know what they say, kids can't be too happy, right? (Does anyone say that? I just made it up.) Zinnia and the old Draconid lady who turns out to be her grandmother have a serious talk about loss and moving on with one's life. Zinnia seems to have lost someone named Aster, possibly her daughter, so she got herself a Whismur and named it after her. How old is Zinnia, anyway? She looks quite young, so she probably was a teen mom.
Oh yeah, and I also finally go on that date with Brendan. He's nice and awkward about it and when we get back home, he says goodnight and... that's it. Whew.
And that's that. I just spent nearly three hours writing this post about the greatness of the Delta Episode. All that information is available on many sites already, so I'm not really sure what was the point in all that effort. Whatever. The Delta Episode was amazing. 10/10. Next I'll head out to the Battle Resort. Since it's not the Battle Frontier, I don't expect much, but hey, there are Move Tutors there. I've missed those guys.
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