Post by LUNI_TUNZ on Oct 16, 2014 15:58:45 GMT -4
Professor Sexymore welcomes us and tells us his story. It's time for his annual Summer Camp, because it's Vacation time, brothers/Vacation time, brothers/vacation... vacation!
It's the long awaited sequel to the Pokémon 1980's Summer Camp movie, the time for dodgy summertime hijinks, it's going to be a...
If that's not the perfect summary of Summer Camp hijinx, I don't know what is.
Jesse has even let her hair down for the Summer, while Team Rocket stand around and blatantly exposit their plans, their boss... no, not that boss, but Madame Catherine, the intimidating but caring cafeteria boss, instructs them that these children who bum about the country side are in want of a good meal, that will be paid for by the state, and if they do a good enough job they'll get a raise.
That must be a word they haven't heard in forever.
After telling Sexymore about Mega Lucario, the Twerps get shown their cabin. Serena and Bonnie bunk with Ash and Clemont. It's a good thing that this Summer Camp has coed cabins, it'll make all that getting laid and panty raids that much easier. Apparently each cabin consists of a single team, the Twerps being Team Froakie.
The Twerps set up, and Clemont brings up the fact that Ash and Serena both attended Professor Oak's Summer Camp, and that that's when Ash and Serena met. Ash says they should make it as much fun as when they were kids, and Serena agrees. Though, Serena's idea of fun may have shifted in the years since.
Outside some kid and his Conkeldurr, and some fat kid with a horrible haircut and his Squirtle prepare to battle, but they're nice enough to wait for Serena to scan Squirtle with her Pokédex, while super jazzy music plays, "Squirtle, the Tiny Turtle Pokémon. During battle, Squirtle hides in its shell then it sprays water at its opponent whenever it can."
With that over, they start the battle, Conkeldurr comes in with Superpower, and the bad hair kid has Squirtle dodge by getting in close, then leaping high above and out of Conkeldurr's way. Squirtle continues to make a fool out of... whatever the hell Conkeldurr is supposed to be, while Conkeldurr's trainer gets super-pissed that Squirtle isn't just standing still getting hit by concrete poles.
Squirtle then puts an end to Conkeldurr with Skull Bash... what a wuss.
Ash wants to battle with the kid, who introduces himself as Tierno from Team Squirtle. He's surprised to hear Ash is from Pallet Town, or maybe just never heard of it, as it's in an entirely different country. He introduces Tierno to the rest of Team Froakie-Twerp, and Tierno recognizes Serena, with surprising agility Tierno runs off and grabs some skinny girl with an equally bad hairstyle and Bianca-Chipmunk teeth.
With her equally chipmunk voice she announces that she saw her on PokéVision. That's right, the service by which young trainers upload video of themselves on the internet for any weirdo with an internet connection to watch. The internet wasn't what it is now in the 1980's, but I'm sure watching video of girls on the internet would be a major plotline of them.
Ash doesn't remember what it is, since it isn't a Pokémon, which is weird since he was right there when she made it.
Suddenly Clemont remembers his panty dropping clusterfuck of a video.
Shauna has been a "fan" of Serena since she saw her video, which isn't usually a thing a girl want to be told about videos of themselves on the internet. Shauna takes her to the Pokémon Center, where she shows her that "44061 [indecipherable character]" amount of people have watched her video.
Shauna begs to see Fennekin and when Serena let's her out, Shauna gets on all fours to pet Fennekin. Shauna's also made a few PokéVision videos, and she makes one every time she catches a new Pokémon, which actually must be a pain in the ass to travel all the way back just to make a thirty second video.
She shows them a video of her and Bulbasaur, where she says that it's her first Pokémon, it likes to run and that it's voice is cute, despite all Bulbasaur's voices sounding like they smoked 12 packs a day for 12 years straight. She let's her Bulbasaur out, apparently after it just got through smoking a pack and the twerps marvel over it. "Bulbasaur, the Seed Pokémon. A young Bulbasaur uses the nutrients from its seed for the energy it needs to grow."
It also proves to be a bit of a prick, and turns it's nose up at Pikachu and Fennekin. Chespin comes out and decides that it's going to be the center of attention right goddamn now, and Ash decides to let Froakie out to play.
Serena then decides to feed the Pokémon her Poképuffs and they all like it, except Bulbasaur who's decided that it would rather starve to death and die then eat from Serena's lowly paw, so Shauna has to come in and feed it instead - because it don't just eat anyone's Poképuffs.
Meanwhile a Charmander shows up, and decides that IT'S going to be the center of goddamn attention. "Charmander, the Lizard Pokémon. When the tip of Charmander's tail burns brightly, that indicates it's in good health. "It's trainer follows behind and he had probably the worst hairstyle of them all. Goddamn France, I thought you were supposed to with it on the fashion scene. The boy's name is Trevor, or Trevs for short.
Trevs apparently has the same cardio plan as Clemont, and Shauna explains that Charmander is always ready to battle, which I'm sure is it's way of dealing with it's changing body and confusing hormones, and all these Summer Camp hijinx surely won't slow it down.
Trevor also recognizes Serena, and teaches us a bit more about Shauna as she not only showed the video to all of her friends, but also showed it to them... a million times. Obviously, that's an exaggeration, but it still was apparently a huge number.
I suppose Charmander isn't the only one dealing with it's changing body and confusing hormones.
Trevor gets excited by Pikachu and decides to take a picture of him, he likes taking pictures of all Pokémon he meets, like Trip and Todd McFuckstick before him. He hopes to meet not only every Pokémon, but even discover new ones not even listed in the Pokédex, and being in this close of vicinity to Ash has shot his chances of doing that from like 2% to probably 1000%.
Team Squirtle being good friends, apparently all travel out into the scary dark forests alone, to one day be killed by Wild ravenous Pokémon, with no one around to find the bodies afterwards.
They ask Ash about his dreams and he reiterates his increasingly lofty goal of becoming a Pokémon Master.
This strikes a cord with Serena as she only joined up with the twerps because she was DTF. Before she can think too long on it, she makes her way onto the beach that the Sexy Professy and Nurse Joy have gathered them on. He also hopes they have LOTS of fun, which is probably not the thing you want to say in a 1980's Summer Camp movie sequel.
He introduces the kids to his staff... and the other employees. There's Nurse Joy, who I've already mentioned, and intimidating Madame Catherine, who really talks up her staff... and her chefs, Team Rocket who are apparently "The Best", another word they likely don't hear often.
He begins explaining the points system.
First place get's 10 points
Second place gets 7 points
Third place gets 3 points
And everyone else gets shit.
The team with the most points gets inducted into the Summer Camp Hall-of-Fame, like current champion Diantha when she was their ages. Team Froakie and Team Squirtle are the only teams with names, so I wonder who'll rank 1st and 2nd?
On the first day, to get acquainted trainers have regular Pokémon battles, with no points being awarded what-so-ever. Ash picks Tierno to battle, Shauna wants to get acquainted with Serena, and the rest are stuck battling each other, because fuck the nameless background trainers.
Bonnie cheers on Ash and Froakie (poor Clemont) against Tierno and Squirtle, and Serena takes this time to admit that this is her first official battle, and Shauna couldn't be happier to be Serena's first. Clemont and Trevor's dialogue goes here...
...
Anyway, Team Rocket are watching the twerps get ready to battle, when they're reminded that they have a dinner to cook for these penniless children.
Held cells of Pokémon attack as Serena and Shauna are the firsts of Team Twerp to battle, Fennekin is almost knocked out by an Energy Ball, Shauna then takes the time to tell Serena that she's wants to be the world's greatest Pokémon performer, which I guess is similar to Pokémon Contests.
Chespin dodges a move from Charmander, only for it's ass to be lit on fire. Squirtle dodges a Water Pulse, as Tierno tells Ash he wants him and his Pokémon to be a dance team. That's pretty lame.
However it's effective as Squirtle gets it's claws right at Froakie's neck before it can hit with Water Pulse, and Tierno is declared the winner.
We don't find out who won any of the other battles, as we see Team Twerp in the mess hall talking each other up. Clemont mentions how you can never predict what Ash is going to do, and Ash lies and tells Team Squirtle how Clemont's inventions are always helping them, and fortunately omits the part about them being worthless hunks of shit and exploding all the time. Bonnie asks about Serena and Shauna's battle, and says that Shauna showed her a lot of things.
Oh my, and in public?
Team Rocket beam at the site of the kids enjoying James' recipe, though Jesse thinks her taste-testing the food had more of a part. Madame Catherine shows up to intimidatingly... GIVES THEM A RAISE!
Later that night, Serena sits on the dock and goes over the fact that everyone is on a journey to accomplish their dreams, except her.
Well, that's not entirely true, some would say getting laid is a journey itself. And at least it seems she has a second option, now.
It's the long awaited sequel to the Pokémon 1980's Summer Camp movie, the time for dodgy summertime hijinks, it's going to be a...
If that's not the perfect summary of Summer Camp hijinx, I don't know what is.
Jesse has even let her hair down for the Summer, while Team Rocket stand around and blatantly exposit their plans, their boss... no, not that boss, but Madame Catherine, the intimidating but caring cafeteria boss, instructs them that these children who bum about the country side are in want of a good meal, that will be paid for by the state, and if they do a good enough job they'll get a raise.
That must be a word they haven't heard in forever.
After telling Sexymore about Mega Lucario, the Twerps get shown their cabin. Serena and Bonnie bunk with Ash and Clemont. It's a good thing that this Summer Camp has coed cabins, it'll make all that getting laid and panty raids that much easier. Apparently each cabin consists of a single team, the Twerps being Team Froakie.
The Twerps set up, and Clemont brings up the fact that Ash and Serena both attended Professor Oak's Summer Camp, and that that's when Ash and Serena met. Ash says they should make it as much fun as when they were kids, and Serena agrees. Though, Serena's idea of fun may have shifted in the years since.
Outside some kid and his Conkeldurr, and some fat kid with a horrible haircut and his Squirtle prepare to battle, but they're nice enough to wait for Serena to scan Squirtle with her Pokédex, while super jazzy music plays, "Squirtle, the Tiny Turtle Pokémon. During battle, Squirtle hides in its shell then it sprays water at its opponent whenever it can."
With that over, they start the battle, Conkeldurr comes in with Superpower, and the bad hair kid has Squirtle dodge by getting in close, then leaping high above and out of Conkeldurr's way. Squirtle continues to make a fool out of... whatever the hell Conkeldurr is supposed to be, while Conkeldurr's trainer gets super-pissed that Squirtle isn't just standing still getting hit by concrete poles.
Squirtle then puts an end to Conkeldurr with Skull Bash... what a wuss.
Ash wants to battle with the kid, who introduces himself as Tierno from Team Squirtle. He's surprised to hear Ash is from Pallet Town, or maybe just never heard of it, as it's in an entirely different country. He introduces Tierno to the rest of Team Froakie-Twerp, and Tierno recognizes Serena, with surprising agility Tierno runs off and grabs some skinny girl with an equally bad hairstyle and Bianca-Chipmunk teeth.
With her equally chipmunk voice she announces that she saw her on PokéVision. That's right, the service by which young trainers upload video of themselves on the internet for any weirdo with an internet connection to watch. The internet wasn't what it is now in the 1980's, but I'm sure watching video of girls on the internet would be a major plotline of them.
Ash doesn't remember what it is, since it isn't a Pokémon, which is weird since he was right there when she made it.
Suddenly Clemont remembers his panty dropping clusterfuck of a video.
Shauna has been a "fan" of Serena since she saw her video, which isn't usually a thing a girl want to be told about videos of themselves on the internet. Shauna takes her to the Pokémon Center, where she shows her that "44061 [indecipherable character]" amount of people have watched her video.
Shauna begs to see Fennekin and when Serena let's her out, Shauna gets on all fours to pet Fennekin. Shauna's also made a few PokéVision videos, and she makes one every time she catches a new Pokémon, which actually must be a pain in the ass to travel all the way back just to make a thirty second video.
She shows them a video of her and Bulbasaur, where she says that it's her first Pokémon, it likes to run and that it's voice is cute, despite all Bulbasaur's voices sounding like they smoked 12 packs a day for 12 years straight. She let's her Bulbasaur out, apparently after it just got through smoking a pack and the twerps marvel over it. "Bulbasaur, the Seed Pokémon. A young Bulbasaur uses the nutrients from its seed for the energy it needs to grow."
It also proves to be a bit of a prick, and turns it's nose up at Pikachu and Fennekin. Chespin comes out and decides that it's going to be the center of attention right goddamn now, and Ash decides to let Froakie out to play.
Serena then decides to feed the Pokémon her Poképuffs and they all like it, except Bulbasaur who's decided that it would rather starve to death and die then eat from Serena's lowly paw, so Shauna has to come in and feed it instead - because it don't just eat anyone's Poképuffs.
Meanwhile a Charmander shows up, and decides that IT'S going to be the center of goddamn attention. "Charmander, the Lizard Pokémon. When the tip of Charmander's tail burns brightly, that indicates it's in good health. "It's trainer follows behind and he had probably the worst hairstyle of them all. Goddamn France, I thought you were supposed to with it on the fashion scene. The boy's name is Trevor, or Trevs for short.
Trevs apparently has the same cardio plan as Clemont, and Shauna explains that Charmander is always ready to battle, which I'm sure is it's way of dealing with it's changing body and confusing hormones, and all these Summer Camp hijinx surely won't slow it down.
Trevor also recognizes Serena, and teaches us a bit more about Shauna as she not only showed the video to all of her friends, but also showed it to them... a million times. Obviously, that's an exaggeration, but it still was apparently a huge number.
I suppose Charmander isn't the only one dealing with it's changing body and confusing hormones.
Trevor gets excited by Pikachu and decides to take a picture of him, he likes taking pictures of all Pokémon he meets, like Trip and Todd McFuckstick before him. He hopes to meet not only every Pokémon, but even discover new ones not even listed in the Pokédex, and being in this close of vicinity to Ash has shot his chances of doing that from like 2% to probably 1000%.
Team Squirtle being good friends, apparently all travel out into the scary dark forests alone, to one day be killed by Wild ravenous Pokémon, with no one around to find the bodies afterwards.
They ask Ash about his dreams and he reiterates his increasingly lofty goal of becoming a Pokémon Master.
This strikes a cord with Serena as she only joined up with the twerps because she was DTF. Before she can think too long on it, she makes her way onto the beach that the Sexy Professy and Nurse Joy have gathered them on. He also hopes they have LOTS of fun, which is probably not the thing you want to say in a 1980's Summer Camp movie sequel.
He introduces the kids to his staff... and the other employees. There's Nurse Joy, who I've already mentioned, and intimidating Madame Catherine, who really talks up her staff... and her chefs, Team Rocket who are apparently "The Best", another word they likely don't hear often.
He begins explaining the points system.
First place get's 10 points
Second place gets 7 points
Third place gets 3 points
And everyone else gets shit.
The team with the most points gets inducted into the Summer Camp Hall-of-Fame, like current champion Diantha when she was their ages. Team Froakie and Team Squirtle are the only teams with names, so I wonder who'll rank 1st and 2nd?
On the first day, to get acquainted trainers have regular Pokémon battles, with no points being awarded what-so-ever. Ash picks Tierno to battle, Shauna wants to get acquainted with Serena, and the rest are stuck battling each other, because fuck the nameless background trainers.
Bonnie cheers on Ash and Froakie (poor Clemont) against Tierno and Squirtle, and Serena takes this time to admit that this is her first official battle, and Shauna couldn't be happier to be Serena's first. Clemont and Trevor's dialogue goes here...
...
Anyway, Team Rocket are watching the twerps get ready to battle, when they're reminded that they have a dinner to cook for these penniless children.
Held cells of Pokémon attack as Serena and Shauna are the firsts of Team Twerp to battle, Fennekin is almost knocked out by an Energy Ball, Shauna then takes the time to tell Serena that she's wants to be the world's greatest Pokémon performer, which I guess is similar to Pokémon Contests.
Chespin dodges a move from Charmander, only for it's ass to be lit on fire. Squirtle dodges a Water Pulse, as Tierno tells Ash he wants him and his Pokémon to be a dance team. That's pretty lame.
However it's effective as Squirtle gets it's claws right at Froakie's neck before it can hit with Water Pulse, and Tierno is declared the winner.
We don't find out who won any of the other battles, as we see Team Twerp in the mess hall talking each other up. Clemont mentions how you can never predict what Ash is going to do, and Ash lies and tells Team Squirtle how Clemont's inventions are always helping them, and fortunately omits the part about them being worthless hunks of shit and exploding all the time. Bonnie asks about Serena and Shauna's battle, and says that Shauna showed her a lot of things.
Oh my, and in public?
Team Rocket beam at the site of the kids enjoying James' recipe, though Jesse thinks her taste-testing the food had more of a part. Madame Catherine shows up to intimidatingly... GIVES THEM A RAISE!
Later that night, Serena sits on the dock and goes over the fact that everyone is on a journey to accomplish their dreams, except her.
Well, that's not entirely true, some would say getting laid is a journey itself. And at least it seems she has a second option, now.
