Post by LUNI_TUNZ on Apr 25, 2018 23:21:29 GMT -4
984: Satoshi to Hoshigumo! Fushigina deai!!
977: A Dream Encounter!
Beset in a foggy mist, the disembodied voice asks to go "over there", "over there" in this case constitutes a foggy mist hiding a craggy mountain. He looks down to the incongruously cheery visage of Pikachu as they head through the fog. And indeterminate amount of time later Ash has scaled the stairs of... um... evil, to the foyer of despair. "Where are we?" Asks the dim boy, for once aware of his mortal insignificance. He stares up to see Lunala and Solgaleo, who stare down at this speck of humanity, as he promises and claims to "understand," which for this child would be a first.
The two then roar, go backwards into their space holes, and do an action which constitutes as almost pornographic, as a weird sperm like shadowy entity takes form, into a weird smoke thing, which makes the subtext into just text.
At this moment Tapu Koko, Tapu Lele and two other monsters shrouded in mystery react to this blatant act of space monster sex, and Type:Null also goes into fits with Gladion in their Cave, as Gladion ominously exclaims... ULTRA BEATS!
Before we get to that, the mystery of the previous two monsters is defeated when the theme song outright names them as Tapu Bulu and Tapu Fini.
Clearly there's no time for suspense when you're preparing, sharing, training, studying A to Z! Bonding, battling, laughing, gettin' crazy you and me, 'Cause it's cooooooooooooooomiiiiiiing sooooooooooooon! (When we all meet our destiny!) Under the Alolan moon! Pokémon!
Rotom tries desperately to wake the lazy boy, his lazy Pikachu, and his lazy Rowlet. Failing this he sicks Litten on him, who takes a little too much pleasure in putting it's ass in Ash's face and slapping him with his tail. Ash has woken up two and a half whole minutes late and now struggles to remember what he promised in his...
At the breakfast table he's gawked at by Kukui who's so impressed at seeing Ash going at his food. Mayhaps his biological clock is ticking? Rotom turns on the news because he doesn't need food he needs information, and the story is about a researcher who just won "Woman of the Year," her name is Professor Burnet, and Kukui is shocked to hear that name and takes a rather defensive position when asked if he knows her.
Apparently she researches ultra Wormholes.
And what are ultra Wormholes?
There's no time to explain, maybe later.
Anyway, at some mysterious ruins known as the Alter of the Sun, Professor Burnet and some similarly attired other scientist rummage around, the one identified as Lusamine mentions this is where the HORRIFIC MASSIVE CONFLICT between the Ultra Beasts took place, and they fucked up her childhood.
Wicke, who looks like she stumbled off the set of Read or Die, is haunted by questions of what the Sun and Moon statues mean, and an obviously evil mannown as Faba is blatantly needling Burnet, out of what Lusamine assumes is jealously.
They head off to research... more, as Faba continues to be evil alund behind their backs.
Ash, playing the role of late anime schoolgirl is stopped once again by his homeboy Tapu Koko, who leads him to the space monster baby Pokémon as he loudly screams about the promise he made in his wet dream.
Ash wonders what Pokémon this Pokémon is, and Rotom... doesn't know. There's no research on it.
Meanwhile at the school Kukui has made it in before Ash who left before him, and wonders where he could be. lana, who's clearly watched the last nineteen movies assumes he was walking along and out jumped a Groudon, however the other who haven't seen the last nineteen movies think, "no fucking way!"
Suddenly a frantic Ash runs in and shouts gibberish at Kukui and reveals to everyone the mysterious thing in his bag. Everyone shoves their faces in it's face, and they realize there's no information on it at all. Ash done discovered a new Pokémon! Wasn't that swell of Ash?
Lillie mumbles to herself as echoes from another Lillie in a different multiverse far away gives her the idea to name this creature "Nebby," due to it looking like a Baby Nebula. Everyone agrees that Nebby is a swell name, even though Sophocles wants to name it Purple Sweet Cotton Candy (HE'S FAT!), but Nebby will do just fine.
Nebby then immediately wakes up and the twerps learn the pain of child rearing as it gives off an ear piercing shriek, also known as crying.
WHO'S THAT POKéMON?
IT WAS BORN LIKE LAST NIGHT FROM SPACE MONSTER SEX, IT HAS NO NAME!
Ash tries pitifully to keep Nebby from crying by screaming at it, and violently tossing it through the air.
Looks like Serena's future children made out good!
Ash then takes a page out of his father, Professor Oak's book by dumping Nebby off to the nearest warm body, and bouncing! Seems like Ash actually has learned something!
Kiawe, now the proud father of his bouncing bastard Pokémon tries ineffectively to make it stop crying before giving up and politely asking mallow for help. Noticibly not just dumping it off on her.
Mallow uses her womanly charms to stop Nebby from crying as Steenee, never wnting to stray far from the limelight uses Sweet Scent, which attracts poor lovelorn Rowlet before blasting it off again.
Nebby, being the chaos child of two space dieties enjoys the disregard shown for Rowlet's life and well being and begins laughing.
Now that Nebby's in a good mood, Kukkui decides it's time to see what it likes to eat. So the twerps set out a series of bowls of Pokémon kibble, but Nebby hates them all, even as ol' "back of the ceral box" Lillie explains that it has all the nutrients a growing Pokémon needs.
The twerps then present other options, all of which it thumbs it's nose up at... you know, if it had a nose... or a thumb by which to thumb said nose up with.
Naturally, Sophocles has some Star Candy in his pocket, and of course these unfit parents are more than happy to allow this growing Pokémon to eat nothing but junk.
On a man-mad island in the middle of the ocean, an Ultra beat's aura is detected by Lusamine's computer on Melemele Island. Hmm, Melemele Island. That sounds familiar.
Anyway, back at some mysterious island who no one knows the name of the Twerps leave the store buying all of Nebby's back for it junk food, and upon arriving back at Kukui's place Ash has a visitor... and so does Lillie. Who could lillie's visitor be?
"MOTHER!?" cries out Lillie. Ash is shocked to learn that the woman who looks exactly like Lillie is related to Lillie.
Lusamine sounds excited to see her child, which is probably what confused Ash, though Lillie doesn't return the affection. Lusamine is also happy to see lillie can now touch Pokémon, and hugs and noggies her little baby, who is SO EMBARRASSED!
The extra snippy Lillie reads her mother the riot act, and brings up that time she evolved her Clefairy into a Clefable whe she wasn't around. Lusamine timidly points out that Clefairy was her fucking Pokémon, and Lillie only wanted to keep it as a Clefairy because it was "cute" that way.
Ash and Kukui are shocked at Lilli'es burst of energy, and Rotom was so enthralled in it it almost didn't immediately recognize Professor Burnet, and Burnet is honored to be known by a talking Pokédex.
Kukui realizes he should probably stop being a toad and introduce his guests to... his other guests. Burnet and Lusamine, who the twerps both already know at this point, and Lusamine introduces the twerps to her guests, the well-endowed Wicke and her huge rack, and that sound you hear is the pants of many a anime watchers hitting the floor at the same time. And next to her is the obviously evil Faba, and his Moe Syslakian grin.
Lusamine quickly changes subjects to Nebby, after touching it in it's face Burnet gives us backstory. A long time ago, Ultra Beasts showed up from "another world" and wrecked shit and Tapu Koko and friends came in and were like "hey, stop wrecking shit!" and fought them off.
Faba tells them it's statically likely that Nebby is one of these Ultra Beasts, and Wicke's breasts shove Burnet off the computer to show them the "Altar of the Sunne," and "THAT'S THE PLACE!" says Ash, the place in his dream where he witnessed sex!
Faba doesn't believe Ash because he's just a child. a poor dumb stupid child, from dumbville.
Lusamine asks Ash to let the Aether Foundation look after Ash, and Wicke bends over placing her rack front and center to sell Ash on the prospect. Ash, immune to the womanly form, declares that he'll continue to look after Nebby himself, because he made a promise.
Faba is talked back from the villain ledge, and Lillie sells Ash's credentials. Receiving a Z-ring and crystal from Tapu Koko is just enough evidence Lusamine needs to back off, and she offers her assistance if Ash is to run into trouble.
Which could happen as the journey is...
---
Pokemopolis Episode Name: The Sex Text!
Dodgyness Rating: 4/5
Animation: 4/5
Story: Ash sees sex for the first time, and the horrible miracle of birth.
Team Rocket: No Team Rocket here.
Moral Learnt: Big dreams are best just for kids.
977: A Dream Encounter!
Beset in a foggy mist, the disembodied voice asks to go "over there", "over there" in this case constitutes a foggy mist hiding a craggy mountain. He looks down to the incongruously cheery visage of Pikachu as they head through the fog. And indeterminate amount of time later Ash has scaled the stairs of... um... evil, to the foyer of despair. "Where are we?" Asks the dim boy, for once aware of his mortal insignificance. He stares up to see Lunala and Solgaleo, who stare down at this speck of humanity, as he promises and claims to "understand," which for this child would be a first.
The two then roar, go backwards into their space holes, and do an action which constitutes as almost pornographic, as a weird sperm like shadowy entity takes form, into a weird smoke thing, which makes the subtext into just text.
At this moment Tapu Koko, Tapu Lele and two other monsters shrouded in mystery react to this blatant act of space monster sex, and Type:Null also goes into fits with Gladion in their Cave, as Gladion ominously exclaims... ULTRA BEATS!
Before we get to that, the mystery of the previous two monsters is defeated when the theme song outright names them as Tapu Bulu and Tapu Fini.
Clearly there's no time for suspense when you're preparing, sharing, training, studying A to Z! Bonding, battling, laughing, gettin' crazy you and me, 'Cause it's cooooooooooooooomiiiiiiing sooooooooooooon! (When we all meet our destiny!) Under the Alolan moon! Pokémon!
Rotom tries desperately to wake the lazy boy, his lazy Pikachu, and his lazy Rowlet. Failing this he sicks Litten on him, who takes a little too much pleasure in putting it's ass in Ash's face and slapping him with his tail. Ash has woken up two and a half whole minutes late and now struggles to remember what he promised in his...
At the breakfast table he's gawked at by Kukui who's so impressed at seeing Ash going at his food. Mayhaps his biological clock is ticking? Rotom turns on the news because he doesn't need food he needs information, and the story is about a researcher who just won "Woman of the Year," her name is Professor Burnet, and Kukui is shocked to hear that name and takes a rather defensive position when asked if he knows her.
Apparently she researches ultra Wormholes.
And what are ultra Wormholes?
There's no time to explain, maybe later.
Anyway, at some mysterious ruins known as the Alter of the Sun, Professor Burnet and some similarly attired other scientist rummage around, the one identified as Lusamine mentions this is where the HORRIFIC MASSIVE CONFLICT between the Ultra Beasts took place, and they fucked up her childhood.
Wicke, who looks like she stumbled off the set of Read or Die, is haunted by questions of what the Sun and Moon statues mean, and an obviously evil mannown as Faba is blatantly needling Burnet, out of what Lusamine assumes is jealously.
They head off to research... more, as Faba continues to be evil alund behind their backs.
Ash, playing the role of late anime schoolgirl is stopped once again by his homeboy Tapu Koko, who leads him to the space monster baby Pokémon as he loudly screams about the promise he made in his wet dream.
Ash wonders what Pokémon this Pokémon is, and Rotom... doesn't know. There's no research on it.
Meanwhile at the school Kukui has made it in before Ash who left before him, and wonders where he could be. lana, who's clearly watched the last nineteen movies assumes he was walking along and out jumped a Groudon, however the other who haven't seen the last nineteen movies think, "no fucking way!"
Suddenly a frantic Ash runs in and shouts gibberish at Kukui and reveals to everyone the mysterious thing in his bag. Everyone shoves their faces in it's face, and they realize there's no information on it at all. Ash done discovered a new Pokémon! Wasn't that swell of Ash?
Lillie mumbles to herself as echoes from another Lillie in a different multiverse far away gives her the idea to name this creature "Nebby," due to it looking like a Baby Nebula. Everyone agrees that Nebby is a swell name, even though Sophocles wants to name it Purple Sweet Cotton Candy (HE'S FAT!), but Nebby will do just fine.
Nebby then immediately wakes up and the twerps learn the pain of child rearing as it gives off an ear piercing shriek, also known as crying.
WHO'S THAT POKéMON?
IT WAS BORN LIKE LAST NIGHT FROM SPACE MONSTER SEX, IT HAS NO NAME!
Ash tries pitifully to keep Nebby from crying by screaming at it, and violently tossing it through the air.
Looks like Serena's future children made out good!
Ash then takes a page out of his father, Professor Oak's book by dumping Nebby off to the nearest warm body, and bouncing! Seems like Ash actually has learned something!
Kiawe, now the proud father of his bouncing bastard Pokémon tries ineffectively to make it stop crying before giving up and politely asking mallow for help. Noticibly not just dumping it off on her.
Mallow uses her womanly charms to stop Nebby from crying as Steenee, never wnting to stray far from the limelight uses Sweet Scent, which attracts poor lovelorn Rowlet before blasting it off again.
Nebby, being the chaos child of two space dieties enjoys the disregard shown for Rowlet's life and well being and begins laughing.
Now that Nebby's in a good mood, Kukkui decides it's time to see what it likes to eat. So the twerps set out a series of bowls of Pokémon kibble, but Nebby hates them all, even as ol' "back of the ceral box" Lillie explains that it has all the nutrients a growing Pokémon needs.
The twerps then present other options, all of which it thumbs it's nose up at... you know, if it had a nose... or a thumb by which to thumb said nose up with.
Naturally, Sophocles has some Star Candy in his pocket, and of course these unfit parents are more than happy to allow this growing Pokémon to eat nothing but junk.
On a man-mad island in the middle of the ocean, an Ultra beat's aura is detected by Lusamine's computer on Melemele Island. Hmm, Melemele Island. That sounds familiar.
Anyway, back at some mysterious island who no one knows the name of the Twerps leave the store buying all of Nebby's back for it junk food, and upon arriving back at Kukui's place Ash has a visitor... and so does Lillie. Who could lillie's visitor be?
"MOTHER!?" cries out Lillie. Ash is shocked to learn that the woman who looks exactly like Lillie is related to Lillie.
Lusamine sounds excited to see her child, which is probably what confused Ash, though Lillie doesn't return the affection. Lusamine is also happy to see lillie can now touch Pokémon, and hugs and noggies her little baby, who is SO EMBARRASSED!
The extra snippy Lillie reads her mother the riot act, and brings up that time she evolved her Clefairy into a Clefable whe she wasn't around. Lusamine timidly points out that Clefairy was her fucking Pokémon, and Lillie only wanted to keep it as a Clefairy because it was "cute" that way.
Ash and Kukui are shocked at Lilli'es burst of energy, and Rotom was so enthralled in it it almost didn't immediately recognize Professor Burnet, and Burnet is honored to be known by a talking Pokédex.
Kukui realizes he should probably stop being a toad and introduce his guests to... his other guests. Burnet and Lusamine, who the twerps both already know at this point, and Lusamine introduces the twerps to her guests, the well-endowed Wicke and her huge rack, and that sound you hear is the pants of many a anime watchers hitting the floor at the same time. And next to her is the obviously evil Faba, and his Moe Syslakian grin.
Lusamine quickly changes subjects to Nebby, after touching it in it's face Burnet gives us backstory. A long time ago, Ultra Beasts showed up from "another world" and wrecked shit and Tapu Koko and friends came in and were like "hey, stop wrecking shit!" and fought them off.
Faba tells them it's statically likely that Nebby is one of these Ultra Beasts, and Wicke's breasts shove Burnet off the computer to show them the "Altar of the Sunne," and "THAT'S THE PLACE!" says Ash, the place in his dream where he witnessed sex!
Faba doesn't believe Ash because he's just a child. a poor dumb stupid child, from dumbville.
Lusamine asks Ash to let the Aether Foundation look after Ash, and Wicke bends over placing her rack front and center to sell Ash on the prospect. Ash, immune to the womanly form, declares that he'll continue to look after Nebby himself, because he made a promise.
Faba is talked back from the villain ledge, and Lillie sells Ash's credentials. Receiving a Z-ring and crystal from Tapu Koko is just enough evidence Lusamine needs to back off, and she offers her assistance if Ash is to run into trouble.
Which could happen as the journey is...
---
Pokemopolis Episode Name: The Sex Text!
Dodgyness Rating: 4/5
Animation: 4/5
Story: Ash sees sex for the first time, and the horrible miracle of birth.
Team Rocket: No Team Rocket here.
Moral Learnt: Big dreams are best just for kids.
